Goblins v Faeries (real-life this time!)
I know that this will make many of you green with envy, but I managed to get in an actual, real game against an actual other person the other week. (I’m in Switzerland, so it’s allowed). And it was a good one. Here’s the report.
Goblins
- Doug the Flatulent (a.k.a. My most hated goblin ever!)
- Beaky Bobby
- Firespitter
- Boom Boom McBoom
- Viscious Midget
- Dim & Dimmer
- The Fencer
- Belladonna
- Butterfingers
- Gwendoline
- Herbert Growbottom
- Boulder
We ended up with an unusual setup of moonstones, all pretty much in a line across the centre of the board. The goblin player had already called mulligan so the choice was mine. I figured that even they were all central, the moonstones were in a long line so I had the possibility to outflank the goblins and pick off the ones on the sides. There were some deep moonstones but I had Boulder and Herbert to help harvesting. Boulder could also go up the middle and tie up the goblins, with calcify helping to drain their energy. At least, that was the plan…
Turn 1
It’s a relatively standard first turn. Everyone advances. Herbert harvests the first moonstone with the aid of Boulder’s Stone song and digs up a second to depth of one.
The one bit of drama is Boom Boom luring Fencer down from her lofty perch on top of the hill, moving her closer to Doug the Flatulent. The faery decides she can take him on and reaction steps further, to guard the moonstone.
At the end of turn 1, things are looking like this.:
Can anyone guess where the fight’s going to be?!
Turn 2
Remember Fencer being confident she could take on Doug? Well, she changes her mind when Doug attacks, keeping her carefully 3 inches away. After an initial exchange, which costs Fencer half her wounds, Fencer backs away. Doug chases after her.
Belladonna steps in and targets Doug with Drops of nightshade. Her hatred of the goblin is strong, but it’s not quite sufficient for her to go kamikaze and use the catastrophe in her hand. Instead, she uses a pink 1 that Gwendoline Scried away in turn 1. She makes Doug attack Beaky Bobby, keen to take out the goblin’s healer. He deals a few damage but nothing too substantial.
At this point, my hatred of Doug takes over. Fencer is already down 3 damage and Gwendoline is a a long way away, so Belladonna ends her activation by swapping places with Fencer, bringing her back into the fray. Maybe Fencer can take out Doug before she’s slain.
Fencer swoops in and deals 5 damage to Doug, but not before he finishes her off.
Turn 2
Remember Fencer being confident she could take on Doug? Well, she changes her mind when Doug attacks, keeping her carefully 3 inches away. After an initial exchange, which costs Fencer half her wounds, Fencer backs away. Doug chases after her.
Belladonna steps in and targets Doug with Drops of nightshade. Her hatred of the goblin is strong, but it’s not quite sufficient for her to go kamikaze and use the catastrophe in her hand. Instead, she uses a pink 1 that Gwendoline Scried away in turn 1. She makes Doug attack Beaky Bobby, keen to take out the goblin’s healer. He deals a few damage but nothing too substantial.
At this point, my hatred of Doug takes over. Fencer is already down 3 damage and Gwendoline is a a long way away, so Belladonna ends her activation by swapping places with Fencer, bringing her back into the fray. Maybe Fencer can take out Doug before she’s slain.
Fencer swoops in and deals 5 damage to Doug, but not before he finishes her off.
Bye bye, Fencer!
To add insult to injury, Beaky Bobby activates yet and fully heals both Doug and himself, thanks to an excellent hand and my refusal to accept realities.
Firespitter then targets Boulder but does only two damage. That’s still enough to infuriate the troll, who moves forward to take on Dim & Dimmer. This is where it would have helped if I’d have read the cards more closely, on my first play with Boulder. His bonus impact damage is little use against Dim & Dimmer’s impact protection. After a short fight, Dim & Dimmer defeats the troll and both heads roar in victory.
To add insult to injury, Beaky Bobby activates yet and fully heals both Doug and himself, thanks to an excellent hand and my refusal to accept realities.
Firespitter then targets Boulder but does only two damage. That’s still enough to infuriate the troll, who moves forward to take on Dim & Dimmer. This is where it would have helped if I’d have read the cards more closely, on my first play with Boulder. His bonus impact damage is little use against Dim & Dimmer’s impact protection. After a short fight, Dim & Dimmer defeats the troll and both heads roar in victory.
The fight of the match… or not
Meanwhile, Vicious Midget has been tiptoeing around the side. He harvests the goblins’ first moonstone. Herbert is none too pleased. He cuts through the goblin’s armour with his magical attack, dealing 4 damage. The goblin player kicks himself for getting distracted by the moonstone and not taking Vicious Midget on a slaughter-fest.
Boom Boom lures Butterfingers 6 inches towards him and deals 2 damage in melee. Gwendoline immediately heals Butterfingers, pulling him towards her, just close enough for him to proceed to finish off Vicious Midget with Fizzle-pop.
At the end of turn 2, the faeries are down Boulder and Fencer to Vicious Midget, but are leading by two moonstones (both held by Herbert) to none.
Turn 3
Emboldened by his recent goblin-slaying feat, Butterfingers hides behind cart and Fizzle-pops Dim & Dimmer. The giant is now down to one health. Beaky Bobby activates next and heals 9 on Dim & Dimmer. (Grrrr!)
Gwendoline picks up the moonstone dropped by Viscous Midget moonstone and heals butterfingers some more. Boom Boom picks 2 moonstones. Now we’re three moonstones (Faeries) to two (Goblins).
Herbert grows two wooded patches to prevent Dim & Dimmer from circling around and attacking, and to make it harder for him to get to one of the remaining moonstones.
Meanwhile, Vicious Midget has been tiptoeing around the side. He harvests the goblins’ first moonstone. Herbert is none too pleased. He cuts through the goblin’s armour with his magical attack, dealing 4 damage. The goblin player kicks himself for getting distracted by the moonstone and not taking Vicious Midget on a slaughter-fest.
Boom Boom lures Butterfingers 6 inches towards him and deals 2 damage in melee. Gwendoline immediately heals Butterfingers, pulling him towards her, just close enough for him to proceed to finish off Vicious Midget with Fizzle-pop.
At the end of turn 2, the faeries are down Boulder and Fencer to Vicious Midget, but are leading by two moonstones (both held by Herbert) to none.
Turn 3
Emboldened by his recent goblin-slaying feat, Butterfingers hides behind cart and Fizzle-pops Dim & Dimmer. The giant is now down to one health. Beaky Bobby activates next and heals 9 on Dim & Dimmer. (Grrrr!)
Gwendoline picks up the moonstone dropped by Viscous Midget moonstone and heals butterfingers some more. Boom Boom picks 2 moonstones. Now we’re three moonstones (Faeries) to two (Goblins).
Herbert grows two wooded patches to prevent Dim & Dimmer from circling around and attacking, and to make it harder for him to get to one of the remaining moonstones.
The table is looking greener
The other side of the table, Doug moves in to attack Belladonna. The faery steps in and counters his rising attacks, slashing back with a sweeping cut. Then she uses her signature move Drops of delerium to drain his energy and move him away from the moonstone. She then slips away and harvests it.
The other side of the table, Doug moves in to attack Belladonna. The faery steps in and counters his rising attacks, slashing back with a sweeping cut. Then she uses her signature move Drops of delerium to drain his energy and move him away from the moonstone. She then slips away and harvests it.
Doug just before he gets dazed and moves the other side of Belladonna. You can just see the moonstone behind him
The turn ends with Dim & Dimmer harvesting a moonstone and Firespitter harvesting, then failing to land a hit on Herbert Growbottom. The faeries lead 4 moonstones to 3.
Turn 4
The faeries win the roll-off. Belladonna activates first and targets Doug with Drops of nightshade. She opts to drain his energy rather than play her catastrophe. Firespitter gives that energy right back, though, and also boosts Boom Boom. Firespitter’s activation isn’t over yet! He deals four damage to Herbert, which makes me very nervous, as Herbert is holding two moonstones.
Doug attacks Belladonna. Somehow, she survives once again, and drains the goblin’s energy with Drops of delerium. Boom Boom follows up by luring in Belladonna and attacking her in melee. Finally, the faery, having faced off against Doug for two turn, falls. Boom Boom picks up her moonstone.
3 moonstones each!
The turn ends with Dim & Dimmer harvesting a moonstone and Firespitter harvesting, then failing to land a hit on Herbert Growbottom. The faeries lead 4 moonstones to 3.
Turn 4
The faeries win the roll-off. Belladonna activates first and targets Doug with Drops of nightshade. She opts to drain his energy rather than play her catastrophe. Firespitter gives that energy right back, though, and also boosts Boom Boom. Firespitter’s activation isn’t over yet! He deals four damage to Herbert, which makes me very nervous, as Herbert is holding two moonstones.
Doug attacks Belladonna. Somehow, she survives once again, and drains the goblin’s energy with Drops of delerium. Boom Boom follows up by luring in Belladonna and attacking her in melee. Finally, the faery, having faced off against Doug for two turn, falls. Boom Boom picks up her moonstone.
3 moonstones each!
Belladonna just before her end
With Dim & Dimmer bearing down on the final moonstone, now is the time for a bold move on the part of the faeries. And who better to do it than Butterfingers? He flies into no-man’s land around the final unharvested moonstone and makes Firespitter and Boom Boom (whose evade stat has been increased, thanks to Firespitter) drop theirs. To win now, the goblins will have to take down Butterfingers, whose engagement zone covers two moonstones.
Beaky Bobby picks up the one accessible moonstone and heals Dim & Dimmer. He’s now vying with Doug as my most hated goblin.
Dim & Dimmer proceeds to draw 3 energy and tries to eat Butterfingers. Luckily, Butterfingers is able to play his signature move, Faery dust x2, saving himself and draining Dim & Dimmer of energy.
With Dim & Dimmer bearing down on the final moonstone, now is the time for a bold move on the part of the faeries. And who better to do it than Butterfingers? He flies into no-man’s land around the final unharvested moonstone and makes Firespitter and Boom Boom (whose evade stat has been increased, thanks to Firespitter) drop theirs. To win now, the goblins will have to take down Butterfingers, whose engagement zone covers two moonstones.
Beaky Bobby picks up the one accessible moonstone and heals Dim & Dimmer. He’s now vying with Doug as my most hated goblin.
Dim & Dimmer proceeds to draw 3 energy and tries to eat Butterfingers. Luckily, Butterfingers is able to play his signature move, Faery dust x2, saving himself and draining Dim & Dimmer of energy.
Here’s the final scene. Faeries win 3 moonstones to 2 – but with the goblin heavy-hitters around those two remaining moonstones, it could very easily have gone the other way.
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